Submitted by: I. Singh
Author: Anonymous Singh on www.sikhsangat.com

Vaheguru ji ka khalsa Vaheguru ji ki fateh

I was fortunate to be in a discussion with the mum of a singh and singhni that i know who gave me some interesting points of view, and i thought this was relevant to be discussed here, as there are many youngster using the forum.

As discussed in another thread, mata ji was saying that it is good to see a lot of young girls taking amrit and stepping on the gurus path. However she gave some severe warnings for these young girls.

If we look at us so called singhs, what are we? Are we really gurmukhs? Are we really real singhs? We dress in bana, wear shastar, go to countless programmes, and yet our minds are still in the mud. Some of us pappi’s have been through this for years and our minds are still all over the place. One of the main reasons is that we confuse ‘chilling out’ with sadh sangat. When we meet other singhs, we somehow beleive that we are in sangat. But sangat is the one which joins you with guru sahib, if in this sangat there is no gurbani, no veechar, no abhiyaas, then how can it be sangat?

One non-amrithdhari brother once noted that the ’singhs’ were no different from his moneh mates except that they were vegetarian and didnt smoke and drink. Is this the ’sangat’ that guru ji talks of?

Yes singhs should have a laugh together as friends, play football, go gym, do training etc. BUT if you do all that every other day and yet only spend say 1 hour a week together in simran, then have we got our priorities the wrong way round?

As singhs we need to realise what real sangat is and become real singhs.

Now for the young sisters …. a number of older gursikh bibian have commented that the young girls look at the singhs and want to be ‘like them’ or be similar to them because it is these singhs that they see as older gursikhs. the elder married bibian dont get out much due to families, kids, work etc and so the young dont have sangat of the elders and hence get a distorted view of life (if you can try and understand that?). One young mother told me how while she was young she had no idea of how a singhni’s life would be like after marriage and becoming a mother. Now she tells me that the responsibility she has of bringing up her child and teaching it gurmat, values, gurbani, kirtan, how to treat other people, the seva of teaching the child sikhi is the greatest seva and privelige she has ever had. She still does plenty of other seva, but this perspective of honest life, can only be seen once she was a mother. Im not sure how many young sisters think of things like that?

Now if our young sisters are wanting to be like us older brothers, then what will they be copying? Will they dress in bana like we do, will they wear nice dastars, carry impressive shastars, ‘chill out’ like we do, etc etc etc, or will they get together and do sukhmani sahibs? Will they discuss gurmat and become gursikhs? or like many of us singhs, will they get caught up in the look and show of sikhi without having the inner qualities? (Truth is that many of us make little or no REAL effort to change either).

This mata ji said that over the last year of observing the young singhnia coming in and out of her home, she has heard little talk of gurmat, but plenty of other chat.

I guess this is the point i am making, while it is fantastic that young sisters are coming into sikhi, they need to make sure that they are following the gurus example, following the examples get by real gursikhs, people like shaheed bhai amrik singh ji’s singhni who visited the uk earlier this year. They should be copied and followed. Be like them, do not aim to be like ‘the singhs’.

Sorry if this offends anyone, thats not the intention at all, i know there are some brilliant kamai wale gursikh brothers and sisters out there, this is more aimed at people like myself who look the part but are black on the inside. Our young sisters (and young brothers) need to make sure they dont make the same mistakes we do/have made.

Sikhi is not about chilling out, its about realising vaheguru. If our life is more about chilling out and less about vaheguru, then what are we doing!! Again apologies if this offends anyone, it would just be brilliant to see the younger singhs and bibian actually making efforts to control their minds and not just get into the whole fancy dressing up thing. May Maharajh bless us all.

Vaheguru ji ka khalsa Vaheguru ji ki fateh